| Eat my +20 Charisma, GEEKS! |
[24 May 2006|11:57am] |
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mood |
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 I Want To Hit Things |
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Due to a severe absence of exoskeleton, and a lack of other useful beetle parts I have made the decision to adopt a pair of antennae. I am currently in the market for a sturdy pair that are feminine and cute while still funtional.
I believe that the acquisition of these tools will undoubtedly change my life forever, causing me to be more human than all of you combined to the 8th power.
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| Audri In Wonderland |
[18 May 2006|02:03pm] |
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mood |
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 giddy |
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I was pleasantly surprised to find that yesterday the most accurate Audri look-alike in comicbook art was staring up at me from the cover of Wonderland #1. I had ordered this book blindly, so I didn't even know what the art style was. I'm just an Alice in Wonderland freak. I've always wanted to be in a comic! Now some poor sap has unwittingly drawn me into the pages of their book, thus increasing my power by 3!
Muahahahaha!
MUAHAHAHAHAHA!
MUAAAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAAAAAA!!
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| "I Said I Like Them Dumb, Not Mentally Handicapped!" |
[16 May 2006|06:07pm] |
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mood |
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 bored |
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I asked myself today what I would do if I couldn't go to Japan like I had been planning to do for the past 8 months. I decided within a matter of minutes; I'll go back home and be a stripper. Why a stripper? Oh it's not so bad a lifestyle, really. So long as you don't let the free booze get to you and make sure to pay your taxes on time. Besides, you get to go shopping all the time, and you have a legitimate excuse! "I'm working! It's for my job!". One can hardly complain about $300+ per night of work.
Anyhow, that's the failure plan. No Japan? Stripper time!
On an off note: The Moby song 'Inside' induces thoughts of being in the womb. Was it supposed to do that? When I listen to that song I have thoughts of being somewhere dark, warm and safe, and it sets off a chain reaction of thoughts that always end in a small nuclear explosion within my head. You see, thinking of the womb inescapably leads one to think of their mother (unless one was born in a glass tube or external egg-like device). Mother's belly is the mystical capsule that transports us into the world like superman's baby space craft.
( Wanna Hear The Rest Of The Story? Maybe you don't... )
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| Password Explosion |
[16 May 2006|09:10am] |
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Edit: Alright, after two hours on the phone with tech support the problem is fixed! The only side effect was that I had to reinstall most of my programs because something was terribly wrong with my system. PHEW!!!
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| Keep on Rockin. |
[15 May 2006|02:12pm] |
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mood |
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 sick |
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Unsuccessful gesture of kindness on friday. Stomach Virus and strip club on Saturday. Early morning farewell for Natsuki on Suday. All in all a full weekend complete with titties, my Andrew, and fond memories of Heartland beer, which no japanese person seems to have heard of, despite the fact that we can only find it in Japan. Why do 98% of strippers have cellulite?
I really like that chocolate candy that's supposed to look like rocks. Who's with me?!
While i'm asking questions I want to know, why do chinese people smell like mothballs?! I mean, obviously not ALL chinese, but a lot of them do*. Especially the old ones. Do they not notice that they stink like the sewers in hell? The smell of mothballs makes my stomach churn with something that's not quite nausea and not exactly atrophy of the sinuses.
*As noted by years of unwilling observation.
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